A Horse And A Fish

So this horse was galloping into town one day, and he stops in front of this, like, trough. And there's a fish in the trough, and it's swimming around, and the horse is getting thirsty. So the horse bends down, grabs the fish with its teeth, and throws the thing about half a mile. That's a horse for you, always impersonating a trebuchet. Now, I wouldn't normally waste everyone's time with a simple story of a horse and a fish, especially when no moral is evident. But I assure you, this is a parable with connotations to the business world. Yes, sir, I can tell you that hidden within this nugget of earthly wisdom is the key to your future. Let's examine this, shall we? Sometimes it helps to gain a fresh perspective on these things.

So we start out by looking at the horse. What is the horse's name? The horse wasn't given a name, and therefore he must represent the proletariat. The fish is swimming around in the horse's trough without taking the horse's needs into account, thereby personifying climate change. Now, it's common knowledge that the industrial revolution stemmed from the extreme changes in climate during the 18^th century. I know because I was there, changing the climate. Why would I do that, you ask? Because Catherine the Great wouldn't give me gold! I told her I'd change the climate if the Russian monarchy didn't give me gold to compensate for the Napoleonic wars, but did she believe me?! The answer is apparent, judging by the noxious fumes you're breathing right now.

Anyway, the interpretation of a story such as this is completely dependant on the reader. That's really the best literary device, and Kaiser Wilhelm II agreed with me. But then again, he wasn't a well known historical figure, so I really don't care what he thinks. I mean, Wilhelm is a nice guy and all, but he doesn't pop. He's like a house that's painted white when all the other houses on the block are yellow. If he was painted red or blue or some secondary color, it might make a difference. But if I was to base my current culinary tastes on the flavor of the historical entity, he'd rank dead last on my little taste test. And that's why they call me "The Taker."