Who Is The Man Behind The Curtain?

The wizard of Oz is infinitely not better than Batman. I mean, if you put the wizard and Batman together in a room, and sealed it up, and left them there for a month, Batman would be the only survivor. He'd probably snap the wizard's neck and cannibalize him. Disgusting, yes, but the only course of survival. Now, if you put Batman in a sealed room with Superman, there'd be no problem. Old Superman would just blast a hole in the wall with his fists.

But no matter how great Superman is, he can never be president of the United States. It's true. He wasn't born here. He's totally from Krypton. And it says in the constitution that if you weren't born in America, you can't be president. So even if Superman was, like, the front runner candidate, and everyone wanted to vote for him, he still couldn't be president. He could be vice president, but what kind of idiot would want to have the tie-breaking vote in the Senate? That's crazy talk.

Only someone as sick in the head as the wizard of Oz would want that translucent responsibility. I mean, the man drowned puppies for fun. It was edited out in the reprints, though. But if you get your hands on an original copy of the "Wizard of Oz", you'd see, and I quote, "...down to the river with them. For they that were the weakest of the litter would be disposed of properly, as was due course. The Wizard was wise in all ways, and knew the ponderous nature of the dogs would not allow for future prosperity." Don't blame me, man. I just read it.